Saturday, June 7, 2008

Flying, Food, Farts

Somehow I actually survived the 16 hour trip to Tokyo without too much pain and without my bag being stolen for a dirty old man to sniff my undies. The flight was uneventful. Unfortunately, the only thing I was able to watch was the same episode of Hannah Montana 6 times in a row. You may think this was my dream. It was, in fact, not.

There have been some studies saying that fasting before and during your flight can actually help you fight jetlag quickly. http://www.boingboing.net/2008/05/26/fasting-may-prevent.html While I knew a complete fast would be a lofty goal, I haven’t been too hungry recently, and thought maybe just a little food would at least sort of help the jetlag. Somehow that turned into 6 full meals in one day. Funny how that always seems to happen to me. I try to tell myself that it was actually two days, but crossing the international dateline still doesn’t give me the right to eat 6 meals in 24 hours – almost all of them exactly 4 hours apart. 1. Egg McMuffin, 2. Large yogurt, berries, and granola, 3. Pot roast with mashed potatoes, 4. Ramen noodles, 5. Lasagna, 6. TBD. I can’t help it if the airplane actually wanted to feed me – something I haven’t experienced in a long time. I bet Jessica is jealous because I believe she listed in her “about me” when she was 12 that her favorite meal was airplane food.
Anyway, although I may have eaten quite a lot today, it is nowhere near a record. If you’re interested, I’ll just remind you of the sickening night that I’m sorry many of you had to witness. Within a stretch of approximately 3 hours I consumed: 1. Soup in a breadbowl, 2. Fruit salad, 3. An entire Yum Wok dinner (local Chinese restaurant), 4. A slice of double-layered mushroom and extra cheese pizza, 5. A bowl of special K red berries, 6. A bag of M&Ms, 7. Instant oatmeal, 8. Sour punch straws, 9. An entire 6 inch meatball hoagie.

As for the last part of my alliterated title: well, some things are best unsaid…and unheard

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